A NOTE TO PARENTS           

The Marquette University Counseling Center serves students by supporting healthy personal and career development.  The center’s staff consists of experienced mental health professionals trained to assist with the emotional challenges, academic choices, and career decisions that accompany young adulthood.

Every fall the Counseling Center offers a transitions group to first year students.  The group provides a confidential supportive environment in which students can discuss their experiences of:

• Developing new friendships
• Coping with homesickness
• Adjusting to new academic demands
• Other topics of mutual interest

Call for more information – 288-7172

PERSONAL COUNSELING

Let your student know that adjustment problems are common, especially during the first year, and the Counseling Center can offer assistance with this and other personal issues including stress and anxiety, depression, relationship and social difficulties, eating and body image concerns, loss and grief, substance abuse, and more.  Services are intended to help students with short-term emotional problems as opposed to providing long-term intensive psychotherapy. A safe and non-threatening environment is assured. Encourage your student to visit our webpage at www.marquette.edu/counseling which includes an outline of our services, as well as links to mental health sites and topics of interest to college students.

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CAREER COUNSELING & DECISIONS

Career planning involves an exploration of interests, abilities and values as they relate to academic majors and careers.  In addition to counseling, a variety of assessment tools, career information resources and websites are available to students. Check out the Counseling Center Career Page for more information.

Your son or daughter may feel pressured to know what they want to major in and what their career path will be as soon as they get here. However, they need time at college to explore different subjects and to be exposed to many career possibilities in order to make a good decision. Making a premature decision about a major or career can end up being more costly in the long run.

REFERRING YOUR STUDENT FOR COUNSELING

The best way is to encourage your student to stop in or call the Counseling Center (414-288-7172) to make an initial appointment.  During this session, your student will meet with a counselor to determine how the Counseling Center can best meet his or her needs. He or she will be scheduled for further appointments as needed or referred to a more appropriate resource. If your student was hospitalized or in long-term psychotherapy before coming to Marquette, we can help with referrals for private mental health care in the Milwaukee area. Counseling services are free of charge to all full-time students.

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CONFIDENTIALITY

Professional ethical standards as well as federal and state laws prohibit us from confirming, denying, or discussing a student’s status as a client unless we have prior written permission from the student.  This applies even if you referred your student to us or discussed concerns about your student with us previously. Please follow-up directly with your student.  If you feel it is important to follow up with us, please ask if your student is willing to sign an authorization allowing us to speak with you. For more information go to CONFIDENTIALITY section of our web page.

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THE COLLEGE TRANSITION...TIPS ON SUPPORTING YOUR FIRST-YEAR STUDENT

ACADEMIC CHALLENGES

Your student will be expected to take responsibility for his or her own learning process. That means going to class, completing assignments and keeping up with the vast amount of reading. Although students spend less time in class than in high school, they are expected to complete far more work outside of the classroom. Learning how to manage time and competing priorities is critical in meeting these new challenges.

What You Can Do To Help:

• Know that it is normal for students to feel overwhelmed at the beginning of their college careers.
• Listen to their concerns for however long they need to express them.
• State your confidence in their ability to make it.
• Make sure that your student does not overload himself/herself (employment, coursework, activities, etc.).
• Let your student know that the Office of Student Educational Services provides academic support services.

SEPARATION ANXIETY

Although most students are excited about college, the prospect of leaving the comfort and familiarity of high school friends and family members can be frightening.

What You Can Do To Help:

• Listen to your student’s concerns and take them seriously. Although separation anxiety does pass, the first few weeks can be intense. Your son or daughter may need a lot of support and reassurance.
• Encourage your student to get involved in organizations, activities, and community service at Marquette.
• Students should know that they are always welcome at home, but encourage them not to come home every weekend. Help them to focus their attention and energy here at school.
• Encourage your student to seek out the support of others, such as their Resident Assistant.
• If your student feels overwhelmed, recommend an appointment at the Counseling Center (288-7172).

IDENTITY DEVELOPMENT

During late adolescence, individuals are in the process of forming their own personal identities. This involves becoming separate persons within the family and creating their own value systems, spiritual beliefs, tastes in clothing, music and friends and making other personal choices. When adolescents make choices that run counter to the values, beliefs and preferences of their parents, this sometimes causes conflict within the family. Yet, this process of carving out their own separate identity is a normal and critical part of their growth and development.

What You Can Do To Help:

• Be tolerant of lifestyle choices your student makes so long as they are not clearly self-destructive.
• Your student needs your acceptance now more than ever, even if he/she seems not to.
• Allow your student to make mistakes. To err is part of the growing process.
• Give your student as much freedom as possible, even if that makes you a bit uneasy. We all want to protect our children, but that is not always in their best interest. Going out with friends, staying out late at night, making choices and experiencing their natural consequences are all part of the process of growing up.
• Give your son or daughter “permission” to separate from you. Holding on and trying to protect them from life will not help them to become responsible adults or to develop their own sense of competence.

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MORE SERIOUS PROBLEMS

The above issues are all part of the normal developmental process of becoming an adult and making the transition to college life. Below is a list of issues that merit your concern, and for which a referral to the Counseling Center or to another mental health agency would be appropriate. Providing support in your child's care often expedites addressing these more serious issues, and helping your student succeed.

• A history of eating disorders, drug or alcohol abuse, depression, mood disorders, suicidal tendencies, self injury, or suspicion that your student may currently be struggling with such issues.
• Involvement in an unhealthy, conflictual, unhappy or violent romantic relationship.
• Difficulty recovering from the break-up of a romantic relationship.
• Your student has a history of problems with conduct, violence or aggression. The stress of starting college can reactivate these issues.
• Significant losses that your son or daughter has experienced, such as parental divorce, critical illness or death of a parent, close relative, or friend.
• Any other trauma experienced by your student that is out of the ordinary, such as a major illness, major surgery, involvement in an automobile accident, witnessing or being the victim of abuse, crime, or trauma.

What You Can Do To Help:

• Be supportive of your student.  Seek the professional help he or she needs. People can’t just “snap out of” serious problems or get better by talking it out with friends or family.
• Be patient. Serious problems can be worked through, but it takes time.
• Feel free to consult with the Counseling Center for assistance in obtaining appropriate help.
• Read this article on: What Can Parents Do To Best Support A Child's College Experience.
• Know your insurance situation

Note:  Some information on this page was adapted from:

George Washington University (http://gwired.gwu.edu/counsel/ParentServices) websites.

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OTHER RESOURCE INFORMATION

BOOKS

Don't Tell Me What To Do: Just Send Money by Helen Johnson and Christine Schelhas-Miller (2000).

Empty Nest…Full Heart:  The Journey From Home To College by Andrea VanSteenhouse and Johanna Parker (1999).

Let The Journey Begin:  A Parent’s Monthly Guide To The College Experience by Jacqueline Kiernan MacKay (2002)

Letting Go: A Parents' Guide to Understanding the College Years by Karen Levin Coburn & Madge Lawrence Treeger (1997).

How To Survive In An Empty Nest:  Reclaiming Your Life When Your Children Have Grown by Robert Lauer (1999)

When Kids Go to College: A Parent's Guide to Changing Relationships by Newman

Almost Grown: Launching Your Child from High School to College by Patrick Pasick, (1998)

Helping Your First Year College Student Succeed by Richard Mullendore and Cathie Hatch (2000)

Let the Journey Begin: A Parent's Monthly Guide to the College Experience by Jacueline Keenan Mackay & Wanda Ingram (2001)

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WEB SITES

Marquette University Parents' Association

College Parents of America

The U.S. Department of Education’s Higher Education Center for Alcohol and Other Drug Prevention

Facts on Tap - Listserve and e-newsletter for parents. Parents can sign up to share information, get support and offer advice with other parents nationally.

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